The Big Kahuna

For the last 2 years I have trained to beat a World Record. That world Record is: The smallest boat, to travel the longest distance, in the fastest time. The first part of my training took me to the Big Island of Hawaii. Where in winter waves can range between 30 and 50 feet tall. Islanders saw me crash wave after wave. and get bloodier by the crash. they called me "the crazy main lander" till one night I sat with them at a bonfire. A Hawaiian, by the name of Mafuu; sat down beside me. He asked. " why do you crash wave after wave. when I've seen you glide through waves without hesitation? Do you have a Death wish?" I said. "No I do not." "Then why must you crash these waves?"Mafuu exclaimed. "because I'm training to beat a world record. And in the southern reaches of Africa and Australia I will be facing waves as high as 80 to 140 feet in height. the training is not how to surf the wave. the training is how to survive a crash of a much larger wave." the explanation seemed to suit him and he was quiet for a short time. I had not noticed that the music had died off or that all the party goers were quiet. when he finally regrouped his thought he looked to me and asked: "Did you not notice today that all of us left the water?" when i didn't answer he pushed the subject and asked:" did you not realize how much you were bleeding or that a lot of sharks were around? A ten footer chased you down the last wave. at the last moment it veered off. Why do u push yourself so hard?" "I'm beating this world record for charity. I have lost 8 people I've known to cancer. 2 of which died in my arms. one was my father. another my friend." at this time I wondered if I hadn't drank too much. my head became dreamy and my hands felt clammy. Mafuu looked to me with a renewed sense of worry. "for 9 months I've watched you and never liked you. But never once did I take the time to ask you. I thought you be be just another crazy Main lander." he looked me over quite intensely: and barked to friends to bring a car around. what is your name main lander?" Joey Selph. I slurred. " well joey you need to go to a hospital immediately, cause I fear you may die." I poked at a swollen ear bitten the night before and asked:"Are blue centipedes lethal? "Not unless your allergic to bees"He said."But in the last hour you've become white as a sheet. your fever I can see. your knees and elbows are twice to three times there normal size. you have a staff infection that is very bad." it was only then that I realized someone had grabbed me. strong arms made sure I didn't fall. in a white haze I passed out. When I awoke. Mafuu was in the chair next to me. the I.V. plugged unceremoniously in my arm. "you scared me joey. you were out for nearly 12 hours." the paste film that was my voice finally gave way to words. "Sorry." Was all I could say.mafuu walked to the door. being satisfied that we were alone he walked back and began to speak."Years ago I was bitten by a shark." he looked out the window and all I could see was another flawless Hawaiian day. but, he was caught in a memory that shook him to the core. without turning he said."I nearly quit surfing over that shark attack. I was full of rage about a family members death. and ignored many of the things I 've always known about this Island." he raised his shirt and beneath it was a perfect circle of shark teeth scars."I was angry cause I watched my mother die of cancer."

This is just an example to show you the gravity of what I ll be facing in a boat not much larger than this kayak. THIS IS NOT A PICTURE OF ME. It was taken in Honolulu. I trained on the big island of Kona.